The Perfect Child

I have a bit of a Mommy brag - but I have the world's best child. Seriously.

Let me preface this blog by saying you probably don't want to read while eating...



Let's start with a little background. Wednesday night/Thursday morning Drew woke up in the middle of the night spewing everywhere. This went on every 30 minutes for hours!

Needless to say he ruined his perfect attendance at school that Thursday. I planned to stay home with him in the AM and then head to work while Dave took the afternoon shift.

Trouble is, about 30 minutes before Dave's shift started, this Mama caught the "Drew Bug". So I ended up working from home the next two days.

Friday evening while Dave was making dinner and about 15 minutes after bragging he was overlooked by this illness - BAM!! He spent the better part of the evening into the morning in the bathroom.

So back to me, Saturday I had a 1/2 Marathon scheduled and despite not being able to train due to weather and illness (sinus and other stuff) I decided I'd still go out there and know it won't be my best time... I just wanted the medal. Big mistake. Big. HUGE!

The second I walked in the door I lost it all and couldn't keep anything down. all. day. long. So I was bedridden (minus my runs to the bathroom) and Dave was bedridden most of the day.

Poor Drew was in his PJs all day long left to fend for himself. He did pop into the room looking for attention periodically and we played a couple of games, but for the most part our 5YO was fending for himself. And he was an angel! No harassing. No whining. No complaining. The perfect child.

Thankfully Dave turned a corner later in the day and made everyone dinner (which I managed to keep down). And gave Drew some much needed attention.

Sunday I was still only at 30% but had to take Drew to Sunday School - they are practicing for their Christmas Show and I had to set up the altar (hopefully I didn't share cooties). I came home and stayed in bed the better part of the day.

Dave was at about 75% and took Drew out for lunch and a bike ride to the park - poor kid had cabin fever. When he's home he's been doing his workbook (the picture above). Still never once complaining about anything.

When I picked him up at school tonight, he was so happy I wasn't going straight to bed. He said "mommy I take care of you when you're sick and give you get better powers. Just like you did for me."

See? Perfect child.

Remind me of this story the next time I complain about attitude problems....


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Shhh He's Sleeping

So on Sunday we were headed to church and we were waiting for the light to make the the left into the church's driveway when suddenly this conversation took place:

Drew: (yelling) Shhhh turn down the radio Mommy.
Me: Why?
Drew: Because it's too noisy and he's trying to sleep.
Me: Who?
Drew: That deer over there (pointing to the side of the road at a dead deer)
Me: (holding back a chuckle) That's right honey he's just sleeping.
Drew: Shhh we have to be quiet because he's really tired, we can't wake him up.

And since we can't just have a tragic story about a dead deer... here's a picture from Drew's soccer practice the other day.

Don't you dig the matching cleats?  Gotta love Adidas hand me downs!

You're Not Going to Believe This..

"You're not going to believe this..." those are the words Drew utters several times a day.  It could be for anything - like he discovered a "Don't Circle" on something the other day, on my computer power cord.  (If you haven't seen his fetish for "don't circles" you need to catch up here)  Or it could be "you're not going to believe this" - about what one of the characters on his TV show said.

Well here's something you're not going to believe.  After refusing to eat noodles for nearly 3 years - Drew ate them the other night with his spaghetti.  And he actually asked for more!  While he would mostly put them on his garlic bread and eat them with his sauce, he did take several bites of them on there own.

While most of you are thinking, so what it's noodles... you don't understand.  My child would gag at the sight of noodles for the past 3 years.  Throw up the moment they touched his lips.  This is a major battle we won - finally.

Like I said, you're not going to believe this!

Come Again?

If you spend a full day with Drew (or likely any 3 year old for that matter) you will find yourself shaking your head or chuckling to yourself a lot about the random things they do or say.

Case in point, my frequent conversations with Drew after I pick him up from School.  Here's how they usually go down:

Me: How was school?  What did you do today?
Drew: I don't know.
Me: Did you play with any friends?
Drew: Yes.
Me: Who?
Drew: I don't know.
Me: What did you learn today?
Drew: I don't know

I'm always oh so glad we had that discussion...

Other days this is the conversation:

Me: How was your day?
Drew: I didn't hit anyone today

I'm thinking - well gee isn't that swell!  Since I hear this only once a month, does that mean you're pummeling your friends every other day of the month?

Then two nights ago,  I really wished I'd have had the video camera for this one... we're driving to Chili's for dinner when I got a call from our friend Brian (Ms. Stephanie - our former day care provider's husband) asking if we wanted to come over.  I told him we were headed to Drew's swim lessons, but we'd try and swing by afterward if Drew was still in the mood - he can get really cranky afterward due to the later hour.

After hanging up with Brian I asked Drew if he thought he'd feel up to going over there - Drew's response (you have to imagine him saying this with all the flair and attitude a 3 year old can muster):

"I think that's a brilliant idea!"

He emphasized the "brilliant" sort of like brillll-i-ant.  I have no idea where he picked that one up... but I died laughing - and had to call Brian back to tell him what Drew said and that we would in fact be there that evening.

Most Annoying Questions

Let's face it, a three year old asks a lot of questions. And I mean a lot!  I get they are inquisitive little beings that are starting to learn about the world around them.  But it's when they ask the most obvious question - even to a three-year-old - and when you ignore it for the first 10 times (because it was so obvious), they just get louder, and whinier until you respond.

It all starts out with the famous question "why"?  Why do I have to?  Why does it do that? But why? Why? Why?!

I learned about a year ago now, the only way to avoid the "why" question turning into a game of 20-why's (you know as in 20-questions), I needed to ask Drew a question back.  "Well why do you think?"  The responses can be rather imaginative or usually stating the obvious, which I've already told him the first 19 times he asked "why".

I never thought I'd say it, but there's a more annoying question than "why".  They're:

• Are we there yet?
• Are we on the freeway?

I was in denial about when the "are we there yet" question would come - I figured in a couple of years on long road trips.  Not just short jaunts to the grocery store, the library or one of our many local errands.

The "are we on the freeway" question is constant in the car!  I have no idea why he's so intrigued with freeways right now, but he MUST know at all times if we're on the freeway (or the street).  Even if the answer was yes (or no), 2.5 seconds earlier.

I'm trying to use this annoyance, and teach him about road signs, and how to tell the difference between the surface streets and freeways.  It's starting to curb bot the "are we there yet" and the "are we on the freeway" questions and turn driving into a game to read the next road sign to tell whether we're coming to our exit, our street etc.

I suppose there could be worst things to complain about right?

Reading Glasses Please

Last week Drew wanted to read a new book. But before he would open the book he announced he needed his reading glasses.

Reading glasses? What?  Did I just hear that right?  Confused I asked what the heck his reading glasses were. Then he said, "My black ones".




So now a happy kid can read - indoors that is.

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I Can't Make This Stuff Up...

Seriously I cannot make this stuff up!    I can't get over the imagination of 3 1/2 year olds. The things that come out of his mouth are hysterical.  I really have no clue where it comes from.

For all of you Facebook followers, there are a few Drew-ism repeats (but one or two newbies), but because I don't document the things posted on Facebook I'll have to post them here - since this also acts as a chronicle of Drew's life.  Here are a few recent conversations with the imaginative 3 YO.

3/18 -
Me: "Drew, get his finger out of his nose"
Drew:  "I can't. A sharp snail crawled up there and I have to get it out." 
Really?

3/21 -
Drew: "You can't wash my face, because then it'll fall off my head, and that would be bad."
Me:  "We'll take our chances."

3/23 -
So I'm reading in bed, and Drew was shocked I wasn't reading out loud.  Here's how the conversation went down:

Drew:  "Mommy you're not reading."
Me: "Yes I am, I'm just reading in my head.  Like when you have thoughts on the inside."
Drew: "I don't have any."
Me: "You don't have any thoughts?"
Drew: "No, the batteries died."

I DIED laughing and called Dave over to replay what happened.  It then went into a discussion about how we replace Drew's batteries. (you need a charger - in case you're wondering LOL)

3/26 -
Drew: "My boogers look like popcorn!" (as he's rolling a fresh one around on his fingertips)
Me: "Um, how do they look like popcorn?"
Drew: "They are white and yellow - like popcorn"

Thankfully he didn't decide to eat this popcorn...

And just to give you a photo for this post... here's a wiped out Drew from almost 2 weeks ago.

Where Do They Come Up With This Stuff?

For those of you who are "friends" with me on Facebook, this first story will be a "repeat", but I need to document it here on the blog.  I take the posts from the blog and keep the stories to share with Drew later as he's older - to serve as a reminder for all the little things I would normally forget.

STORY #1 - Name Change
On Tuesday evening I was giving Drew a bath.  And he threw out something I think is rather profound for a three-year-old.  Here's the conversation that went down:

Drew: "I have something to announce.  I changed my name today"
Me: "What's your new name"
Drew: "Rocky Balboa"

I needed Dave to finish up with Drew's bath while I did a few things on the computer.  As the two of them are in his bedroom, I hear Drew start in again with Dave.

Drew: "I changed my name today to 'lil Rocky Balboa"
Dave: "You did huh, you're my Little Rocky Balboa?"
Drew: "No it's 'lil Rocky"

Fast forward about an hour, and I'm laying in bed with Drew.  Because he's changed his name and all... here's now that conversation went down.

Me: "Goodnight Rocky, I love you"
Drew: "I love you to Adrian.  Your name changed today to Adrian"
Me:

Drew:  "It's not funny!" (he's clearly embarrassed because I was laughing)
Me: "You're right it's not funny.  It's adorable"
Drew: "I"m not adorable, I'm tough like Rocky!"

So fast forward to this morning, it's share day at school - and when Drew realized this he instantly asked to bring his Rocky Poncho to School for share day.  When we get to school he has to show Ms. Jonelle his poncho and explain that its what Rocky wears before he fights. 

She laughs and tells me about how ever since on of the girls in his class decided her name changed to Ariel (as in The Little Mermaid) Drew decided that his name was Rocky.  And that when she calls on him for something she has to say "Drew Rocky", and sometimes he makes her say "Drew Rocky Balboa".  So now we have some background to the name change thing that has recently had us chuckling at home.

STORY #2 - Drew's a Grown-up, well when he wants to be
Here's the second story for you today.  For weeks, if not months, Drew is obsessed with thinking he's older than he is.  Heaven forbid you say he's too little/young to do something. He'll tell you he's a big boy.  He's even thrown out that he's a grown-up (although he's recently decided that grown-ups have hair all over so he's not a grown-up yet... that story is for another blog someday).

So last night after work I was making dinner, trying to put out a few work fires, do the dishes/empty the dishwasher, answering Dave's questions, holding the Spider-man punching bag so Drew could  pound on him, playing some movies for Drew... you know the daily grind for working Mothers.

So needless to say I was a little frustrated and feeling stretched a little thin... and the whining from a certain nameless child was pushing me over the edge.  When I served Drew dinner, he was whining how he didn't want to eat that (oops I threw the nameless child under the bus).  And then the cup I put his milk in wasn't good enough.  Again, the daily grind.

After the incessant complains about the cup.. I told him he couldn't have a cup with a lid because they were all dirty, so he could have the one he had now.. or the hot wheels cup.  He opted for hot wheels - I guess it was cooler than the Red Robin cup I had given him initially LOL.

I then threw in a crack about how I keep having to dirty cups for him, so he's going to learn how to do his own dishes.  Here was our tableside "discussion":

Drew: "I won't ever, never do dishes, because that's for grown ups." 
Me: "Oh yes you will, why do you think I had kids in the first place"
Drew: "I can't do dishes because, it will hurt me"
Me: "It won't hurt you.  You'll do dishes when I tell you to"
Drew: "I won't ever be big, so I can't do dishes".

So tell me, why is it that kids want to grow-up and be big... but only when it suits them?

Say What?

Three-year-olds are notorious for their imaginations - and Drew is notorious for his quick and witty one-liners.  Last weekend he through out a couple of classics... well at least his Daddy and I thought so.

While sitting on the bed at the hotel in Lake Tahoe Drew just announces:
"I"m the best".
Can anyone say narcissistic? 
I suppose it's because we're always telling him how cute and adorable he is - or when he does something especially cute we say "you're the best".  I guess we're kinda creating a monster.


Then a short time later, after we returned from sledding and Dave took off his ski hat, Drew asks Dave to kneel down.  He then goes on to kiss his hair and state:
"Daddy, you smell doinkery".

For those that are confused... "doinkers" in our household are hairs that are out of place.  So the fact that Drew said Dave's essentially smelled doinkery (a totally made up word... you know since doinkers wasn't exactly made up...).

This age can have it's rough moments, but it's little things like this that make me love this kid and age so much!

When I Grow Up

Here is the conversation in the car ride home from school yesterday:

Drew: "When I grow up I wanna be a teacher"
Me: "Do you want to be a Daddy too?"
Drew: "No Daddy's can't be teachers"
Me: "Do you want to drive a car?"
Drew: "Teachers don't drive."
Me: "Ms. Jonelle doesn't drive?"
Drew: "She's a Mommy and a teacher and she drives".

My son has learned at 3 what most men don't realize their entire lives - men can't multitask the way women can. :)

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Say What?

Three year old have quite the imagination.  And they're quite the little parrots when it comes to repeating things you don't want them to say.

Take for instance over the weekend when he had to use the bathroom.  His stool wasn't in front of the toilet (he still wants us to watch him go potty occasionally), and here's the conversation went down:

Drew:
Me: "What was that?"
Drew: "I didn't say 'who moved the freakin' stool'"
Me: "Drew we don't say freakin'"

He know he gets in trouble, so apparently that's what he mumbled under his breath, only he didn't want to get busted for it.

The other day, he was drawing on his easel, and Dave told him to draw Spider-man.  So he draws a face (with eyebrows no less) and a single hand coming out of this face with five fingers.  That's it. 

When Dave asked him about Spider-man's hands Drew said: "Spider-man has five fingers see, 1, 2,3,4,5" 
Now who can argue with that logic?

When "Growing Up" Backfires

Drew and I were talking on our way home from Preschool yesterday about how he needed to try more foods and that he should eat Mommy & Daddy's chicken (I tried to make it seem extra cool because it would have cheese on it).  I also mentioned that if he ate more foods he'd grow up big and strong.

Drew's response: "I don't want to grow up and get hair all over my body".

So much for enticing him with dreams of getting taller and stronger... he sees grown men as hairy beasts. 

Bittersweet Moments

For every parent there are those bittersweet moments.  The moments when you're actually sad to watch your child(ren) grow up - for that brief (and let me stress brief) moment when you wish your son or daughter could freeze in time.

Dave and I had one of those moments on Monday after swim lessons.  Drew was in the back seat talking about "wabbits" - and I said to Dave I'm going to miss the days when he starts pronouncing things correctly.  It'll be another sign that our "baby" is grown up.

Dave chuckled and said, "Why do you think I bring up and have him say 'baden' once in a while when we're in the bathroom getting ready or taking a bath." (For those that don't remember that was how Drew would say water around the ages of 1-2).

While it probably seems like nothing to you, it's just one of those little things I'll miss.  Those sweet little Drew-isms that are slowly fading away as he grows into a wonderful young boy.  Now I wonder if it's possible I'll ever miss the battles, the tantrums, or the "why's"?

Kids Say the Darndest Things...

On Saturday morning Drew was in the bathroom... well watching me go.  (Anyone with young kids knows there's no such thing as privacy).  That's when we had this - shall we say "interesting" conversation.

Drew:  Do you have an ookiepook? (Drew's term for his male parts)
Me: I don't know, do I have an ookiepook? 
Drew: No, you pee out of your butt.

That's one way to look at it I guess...

For the record, I didn't correct him.  I didn't know how to respond to that one.

A Conversation With Daddy

A few days ago, Drew was sleeping in.... as in... it's-now-7:30am-and-Mama-needs-to-go-to-work-and-you're-not-up-yet. So Daddy pulled the short straw that day and had to bring Drew to preschool.

I get home that night with child in tow and and Dave told me about an interesting conversation he had with Drew...

Drew:  Daddy, I look like you.
Dave: I look like you?  Why does daddy look like a little boy?
Drew: No you're a big boy
Dave: Am I a kid?  Or am I a man?
Drew: No. You're not a man.  You're a big boy.

I would really love to have editing  rights and say that the conversation ended there... saying your Dad isn't a man... come on that's funny!  But in all fairness, here's how the conversation ended

Dave: Am I a big boy?
Drew: Yeah.  I'm a big boy too.

Dave said he really wanted to go back to the conversation about what color he was as I mentioned last week, but he chose not to. He really thinks it's funny that he's brown and I'm gray....

Toilet Talk

Here's a few toilet stories from last weekend...

Toilet Talk #1
Picture it, Saturday Morning.  I'm making breakfast, Dave's in his chair watching TV.  Suddenly there's a piercing scream coming from the bathroom.  Dave walks in to see Drew sitting not on, but inside the toilet.  It seems his little tush fell right in - with only his arms and hands hanging out.  It turns out Drew doesn't like it when Mommy and Daddy laugh at his misfortune.

Toilet Talk #2
Now a few hours after the terrifying toilet bowl suck, we're at Grammy and GrampC's house and Drew and Kady are running around the house.  After a few moments I notice the screaming/chasing stopped.  I go and investigate only to find Drew and Kady splashing each other with toilet water!  Who knows which one started that... but I will say that it's uncharacteristic of Drew to initiate something like that.  Follow someone?  Sure, but initiate?  I'm gonna throw my niece under the bus on that one :)

Toilet Talk #3
We're at Ms. Stephanie's house for a BBQ on Sunday and Dave is in the bathroom with Drew.  Here's the conversation that goes between the two of them as it's replayed for me:

Drew: "Daddy, why are you brown?"
Daddy: "What color is Drew?"
Drew: (Analyzes his arm) "Orange."
Daddy: "What color is Mommy?"
Drew: "Grey"

Great, thanks a lot kid.

2-Year Old Logic

I can't say that it's due to starting preschool, but within the past few weeks, Drew has really learned to reason and use logic on us.  It's a daily occurrence to hear the following from Drew:

• "First I lay in bed, then I wake up, then we go to school" - As stated last night before bed
• "We don't go to bed yet.  It's not dark".  - His ploy to stay up a big longer
• "I make you proud, then that makes you happy"
• "First we go to school, then you pick me up and we go home"
• "No we no pick up flash cards.  We make a mess first, then we pick up all the toys"

I do have to say that we're hearing a lot more random conversations since Drew started school - of course as I try to recall them nothing comes to mind.  It's amazing how much of  a transformation he's made in his verbal skills in just a few days.

On the preschool front - drop off yesterday went well.  No tears.  You know he likes school when we go to pick him up and he tells us "Just a minute.  I get to swing now".

His teachers complimented him (and us) yesterday saying he was very smart, and we were teaching him well."  We can take some of the credit, but Ms. Stephanie did just as much (if not more) than we did.  I mean she's the one who taught him his Presidents!

Update as of 8:13am - Dropping Drew off this morning went so well I actually had to call him back to give me a hug and a kiss.  Then one of the teachers said how smart he was and that he could advance to the next class already.  It was said in passing, and I think that has yet to be determined, but what a great compliment to Drew!!

Bust Me Up Daddy!

As I mentioned last week, Drew has a few hilarious new sayings - one of them that cracks us up is when he waves his fist in the air and says: "I'm gonna bust you up!"

Well this past weekend while I was away, Dave and Drew were horsing around and Drew tried to instigate something with his Daddy.  He waves his fist in the air and says the was going to bust Dave up - and started wailing on him. 

Dave didn't immediately respond, and Drew in his little sad voice says: "Daddy... Bust me up!"

And we wonder why Drew has a hitting problem at day care....

Kids Say the Darndest Things

It's almost scary that I can now have an "intelligent" conversation with my 2 1/2 year old.  Of course you'll be chatting along with him and he'll throw something random out there.  Here are a few unusual comments Drew has made in the past week or so:

• "I feel so much better now" - this very sleepy, yet excited declaration was said as I pulled into the garage and he woke up after dozing for the 10 minute ride home from day care. 
• "Frank peed on me" - Drew said this as he was throwing his bath toys into the tub, and one of the Fisher Price guys (who is I guess was christened "Frank") had water leaking out of him. Apparently left over from the previous bath.
• "I'm gonna bust you up!" - picture Drew saying this with his fists raised in the air.  This is what he tells Dave when he's about ready to wrestle or wail on him.
• "Mommy the sun is bothering me, put it in time out.  Stop bothering me sun!" - said often on our way to Day Care in the morning and the sun is blazing into the back seat of the car.  Drew is usually trying to "block" the sun using his hand.  Problem is, he's blocking his right eye, and the sun's beating him on the left side.
• "Mommy kiss my teeth" - he asked me to do this over and over after he did a face plant at day care, tripping on his own feet.  Then Drew proceeded to get mad at me because I didn't "make it small again".  Apparently he has a little bit of a fat lip on the inside.
• "Mommy, do you remember the garage sale (or any other random event)" - Drew apparently has a great memory!  He remembers so much, right now he's intent about talking about the garage sale from 2 weeks ago.  But he talks constantly about our Disneyland trip last September, our trip to Kansas City, the plane ride, and even our original Virginia trip when he saw his little girlfriend Leila!
• "Daddy lay with me for 5 more minutes" - Said at bedtime when Drew doesn't want to be alone.  I thought you ask for 5 more minutes when you wake up in the morning.  Oh yeah - that's what we say to DREW in the morning.... Mr. Early Riser.
• "Mommy/Daddy, I'm so proud of you" - after Dave or I come out of the bathroom.  I guess if Drew's potty training the whole family is potty training.
• "That's my school! That's my school!" - while this isn't normally funny, the part that IS funny is that he thinks a water truck is his school (they're adding onto the church/preschool).  When we try to point out the building that really is his school, he tells us no, it's not. *sigh* there's still  no reasoning with a 2 1/2 year old...
• "Mommy you go for a run like Rocky?" - said after I got back from a morning run.  He's infatuated with Rocky!
• "Mommy, you do exercises!" - As he jumps onto my belly while I'm doing crunches, or puts a toy on my abs watching the toy go up and down.  This is followed by his version of push-ups.

Flipping You the "Bird"

I must apologize ahead of time if you think my son is flipping you the bird.  Within the past week or two, he's become set on pointing to things with his middle finger.  The other day he was intent on pointing to the "purple flowers" that are blooming in our backyard, and refused to use his pointer finger.

I'm not sure really where this comes from, as I don't flip Dave off regularly - or at least within eyesight of Drew.

Yet another phase I hope doesn't last long or at least follow us to church or other inappropriate public place.